No longer numb

Standing at the fork in the road,
looking for a place to turn, a friend to follow.
She sees noone, the pain wells up inside
Who was the first of the many to leave?
Which was that first cut?
Where is the deepest scar?
It no longer matters anymore,
Her body is littered in scars,
criss-crossing over eachother,
they tell a story of pain,
lies, betrayal,
a story of constant abandonment.
Her story is filled to the brim,
Anger, Pain, Humiliation
Guilt, Shame, Depression
Her heart was ice,
then it was melted.
Little did she know
it was melted for the ease
of which the knife now stabs.
Her melted heart is tender,
where as she could once handle the pain,
now it leaves her wanting freedom.
She almost wishes to go back to that frozen heart,
but the warmth of love,
it's intoxicating.
From a nightmare of cold,
where she had become numb
She awoke to the reality of warmth.
It burns her with every move.
Every word brings memories up
memories of her nightmare in the cold.
Of that past,
of being so alone.
She's unsure of how to handle things,
She gets angry,
but there are no bruises left on her,
She feels alone,
but she's unharmed.
She wants to scream,
but her blade is gone.
She doesn't know what to do,
Everything is a mistake,
Everyone hates her,
Only her love cares,
but he can't see the pain,
He tries to spare everyone,
yet fails to see her pain.
She wants to scream,
to shove her bloody arms at him.
How can people be so blind?